Wednesday, March 19, 2008
- Once upon a time - To Monster Lee -
It all begins almost like a fairytale. Having him around blessed me with tonnes of happiness. From darkness, he brought upon light in my life. He cheered on me, encouraging me to go further and never give up on anything. He taught me alot of things. But most of all, he taught me the great value of true love. Something i never found till i met him.
The soft whispers of 'i love you's. The warm, comforting and secure hugs. The little kisses of everyday love. The smiles of a million wonders. The laughter of pure joy. The love of a true person. Something which alot of people think he's not capable of doing. But deep down, i noe he's true.
The good memories of everyday. The sweet laughter of happiness. The cheerfulness. The all sweet pure love that poured out. The bond ever so great that could never break apart. The bitterness of life that tried to tear us apart always fails. The trust we build up for each other stand so strong even though there are days when it rattled.
I'm sowie baby. But i have to confess. I can't live without you around. Everything reminds me of you. From every step i take, to every movement, to every place i go, to everything i see, eat, drink, touch or hear and to every prayer i make. Its just so hard. i can't. i'm sowie. i wanna hug you. I need you damn bad. Call me desperate i dun give a shit. But you're so damn precious to me. You've made a huge (even huge is not the right word) impact in my life. but why now? I dun understand. Really. I received your mail. I read it through and through. I printed it out. I read it again and again. I noe you didn't meant it. But still, i can't understand the decision i have to go through. Alone. I'm sowie if everything that happen put you under so much pressure that you decided on that. Mistakes are made. History can't be erased. This is the song you recently downloaded:
Until the day i die - Story of the Year
Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you
As years go by
I race the clock with you
But if you died right now
You know that I'd die too
I'd die too
You remind me of the times
When I knew who I was (I was)
But still the second hand will catch us
Like it always does
We'll make the same mistakes
I'll take the fall for you
I hope you need this now
Cause I know I still do
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Should I bite my tongue?
Until blood soaks my shirt
We'll never fall apart
Tell me why this hurts so much
My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
But still we'll say, "remember when"
Just like we always do
Just like we always do
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Yeah I'd spill my heart!!!
Yeah I'd spill my heart for you!!!
My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Mistakes like friends do
My hands are at your throat
And I think I hate you
We made the same mistakes
Made the same mistakes
Until the day I die
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you, for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
I'll spill my heart for you
Until the day I die (Until the day I die)
Until the day I die!!!
You're never alone baby.. Even though we might not be living together anymore, i still love you alot.. and i will awaz love you forever and that fact will remain. i have never hated you, and i can never do that. i love you too much to hate you.. in my life there's onie one guy i love the most.... you... no one else.. baby pls. i noe you got your reasons of to why... and i'm willing to listen if you're willing to tell.. my biggest fear happened even though i never ask for it and owas prevent it from happening.. and honestly even till now, i can't stop crying ever since i left that place.. my head hurts. my stitches hurts.. but my heart hurts more.. baby, tell me why..
i've been trying to find myself ever since.. but i just can't seem to.. i try to calm myself but i can't.. my hopes and dreams shattered.. my world came crumbling down.. there's no use to life anymore.. i can't do it.. i've lost myself.. i've lost my courage.. i've lost my faith.. i've lost my cheerfulness.. i've lost everything i hold so dear.. but never once in life i regret ever since i knew you.. coz ever since i knew you, i noe you're special in every way.. it depends on how people look at you..
god, tell me why you took that sparkle from my eyes. god, tell me why this hurts so much.. maybe now we're not meant to be.. tapi as you used to say to me, kalau jodoh tak ke mane... we'll be together someday.. i noe we will.. i love you alot..
-shasha-
19/03/2008
staying alive coz i know i haf you.
if you die, i die too.
i mean what i say to you on websms just now..
the path i've chosen ;
2:31 AM
