[...fuck off bitch...]
after two freaking months plus of arguing, i got enuf... i dun wanna fight animore... our relationship is getting rocky by the day and got worst by the night... enuf is enuf... i said to you three days back, lets start afresh.. and you agreed... things felt lighter in an instant.. and its goin on well for past two days...

but i never knew someone would spoil my day on my bdae...
she got the guts to tell me she likes you and is hoping to be your girl... fcking hell.. what the hell is she thinking...? she got to know you at first... then she start to haf a casual crush.. then now it becames an obsession... i won't still shut up now.. sorie B... her obsession of you has aredi gone up to my furthest limitz... enuf s enuf... it stops here and now... you know how much i hate her.. you know tho shez close with me, i won't be able to click with her... and you know what happenz when im fuming angry...

eh bitch, better fuck off from my life and his too... better watch your fucking back coz im looking for you.. you know how much i hate your presence... yet you still wanna try your luck in trying to win him over.. fuck you bitch... im an angel.. im a devil.. i can be both... trip the wire and you'll see a pretty good demonstration of it... im hunting you down... better watch your freaking back... you want so badly to see how angry i can get eh... if you got the guts to spoil my bdae, n got the guts to tell me you love him, you should haf the guts to come and face me... cross over my dead body n you can haf him... watch out bitch... continue to contact him and prepare to see what'll happen to you.. take care eh sis...

dun fuck around with me.. i dun like it.. fuck off..

[...31 may 06...]
...[10.39pm]...



[...thotz abt love...]
Do you ever wonder how I’m doing?
Do I ever cross your mind anymore?
Am I on your mind like you're on mine?
Can you look at something in your room and not have a memory of me and you come into your head?

Can you wish so much to hear I love you?
Or to have me in your arms again.
Do you ever lay there before you go to bed and wonder if I’m wondering about you too?
Do you ever just hope and wish I’ll call?
Or maybe want to hang out with me.

Do you ever put yourself down and think your not good enough?
Do you ever think what have I done wrong?
Do you ever wonder if by the time you come around,still be there or not?
And if you do, does that scare you?
Is that a risk you want to take?
Is that something your willing to do?

Do you ever get a little smile on your face when you think of me?
When someone says my name, does your heart skip a beat?
If you see me do you fall all over again?
And when you talk to me do you wish you were with me?
When you see me walk by, or standing there do you ever wish you could just run up and say I love you.

Do you ever wish you could hold me in your arms again?
Or have the ability to kiss me anytime you want.
Do you ever wish that you had someone there, someone who would go to the stars for you?
Do you ever hear a song, and somehow make it to relate to me or the situation?

Can you listen to our song without getting teary eyed?
Does any word of it mean anything to you?
And most of all, do you miss me like I miss you?
Do you love me like I love you?

[...nice things i found in my email...]
...[baby i love u]...
[...250506...]
...[12.02am]...



[...its abt us..]
[. s i x t e e n f e b t w o t h o u s a n d s i x .]

the day a new life is born when two hearts merge as one...
the guy who loves me truly...
whose love is pure and sincere..
someone i find it hard to forget or ignore...
someone who managed to capture my heart tat no one else can...
someone who i reali reali love so so much..

things went smoothly for us as the beginning...
we're happy together...
missing each other when apart...
loving each other more and more..
but people just wouldnt want to see us happy together...
sad to say, it was the start of the obstacles...

we manage to pull thru...
survived thru tat one month of survival game...
but once again, harsh incidents start to occur...

we kept quarelling..
we kept fighting...
tears of hurt and pain flow...
we've seen each other cry..
we feel each other's pain...
i have to admit i tried to struggle to be alive..
and you too...

on the second month anniversary...
i got to admit...
i cried...
the pain is killing me...
the distance between us is stretching farther....
i can't stand the distance...
baby i miss you...

every now and then...
i wonder why is this shit happening...
what is happening to us?
what is the cause of all this?
u asked me...
where is our bond and trust?
as u lay on my lap, sleeping, resting ur tired mind...
i sat up all nite thinking...
my heart ache as the questions u asked me kept echoing in my mind...
what am i to do baby??
why is there 3rd party around?
why B? why??

as much as you want us to be close like last time, i do too...
i miss us... i miss you...
i'm sorry i said you're out of reach...
i'm sorry i said you're here but you aint here...
i'm sorry if you think there are other guys in my heart...
i'm sorry bcz of me you're about to be fired..
i'm sorry baby...
i'm sorry bcz of me, we became like this...
i'm sorry i made you cry...
as much this situation hurts n kill you, it hurts n kill me too..

i want us to be together like last time..
the bonding...
the trust...
the smiles and laughter...

i wanna tell you,
i appreciate every single second that you spent your time with me..
i appreciate you...
i love you alot..
alot more than the start...
my love for you has no end..
i can't live my life without you...
there are no other guys in my heart...
you're the onie one i love...
you and onie you...
no one else...
trust me baby...
if there's time for us to be together again,
that million thotz in my mind, i would love to tell you..

the moment you entered my life, everiting changes... you brought sunshine into my life...if no one ever tell you this, lemme be the one who says it to you...from the bottom of my heart, i'm hapie to be your girl... i'm hapie to be in your life, loving you and taking care of you... you're that special someone whom i never thot i would love you alot...baby, i love you... baby, i miss you... cum back pls...

[...werds from the healing heart...]
...[280506]...
[...2.59pm...]
...[baby, i will never leave you alone... i love you alot.. muackz]...



[...im me..]
im stubborn...
im hard-hearted (esp wen im angry)...
im strong-willed and highly motivated...
i haf sharp thoughts...
i can be easily angered wen u trigger my limitz...

i attracts others and loves attention given by loved ones...
i do keep n haf deep feelings...
im beautiful physically and mentally according to my bros n sis...

i haf firm stand point...
i need no motivation wen im highly self motivated...
im not shy towards opposite sex (coz im very socialized)...
im easily consoled in all situation...

im systematic (left brain)...
i loves to dream coz i create my own future...
i haf strong clairvoyance...

im very understanding...
i haf good imagination (haha..!)...
Good physical...? no commentz..
i do at times haf weak breathing...
i Dislike being at home...

i can be very restless...
im very hardworking...
im very high spirited...

Tatz me....
Love me for who i am coz im not gonna be what you want me to be..


[...30 may 2006...]
...[2.50pm]...